And so I type...
It's the first stormy day here since we moved. Gusty wind, rain, leaves blowing about. Although the warm days of barefoot sunshine are numbered, I honestly welcome the change. There is a stagnancy that settles in during late summer, as if things need to be stirred up a little in order to start moving forward once more, progressing through the natural order of seasons. I start to apply this analogy to my own life, and I remember how times of intense creative output often follow big personal "shake-ups." We've certainly had our share of those this year, and we've had the past month of summer to try to recover, to find some normalcy and balance again.
But I was starting to feel a little stagnated. Yes, I'm making plans and constructing a framework and mindset in which to work towards them, but my heart hasn't been fully in it. I suppose I'm still experiencing the after-effects of all the change, and maybe my hesitancy to enter into true creative flow is some kind of subconscious protection mechanism. I'm searching for the spark to help my plans come to life; the same spark that ignited me in the past. Maybe it will be a sudden realization, like this storm whooshing all around me in my safe and cosy house. Or maybe it will be a gradual loosening of the heart taps, first allowing a drip, then a trickle, and finally a stream. However it happens, I have faith it will. Perhaps these present winds of change will stir things up just enough... A song I wrote several years ago, inspired by a friend's casual remark about hoping that good things would be blowing our way: Good Things © 2013 Kelly McQuillan Where’d you go My sweet summer? You left a hole Where my heart was free Where’d you go My sweet lover? You left me cold In the shadows of my dreams There’s a change a comin’ Crashin’ through the trees Stirring up the dying leaves Churning up my memories I could hide Cover myself from the din But I’ll throw open the windows despite the storm ‘Cause I’ve got faith there’ll be good things blowin’ in. I miss the sound Of sunburned silence When words were weightless And harmed no one I miss the smell Of salty idleness When I stretched my limbs And reached up for the sun Now there’s a change a comin’ Crashin’ through the trees Stirring up the dying leaves Churning up my memories I could hide Cover myself from the din But I’ll throw open the windows despite the storm ‘Cause I’ve got faith there’ll be good things blowin’ in. So often misunderstood Sometimes a bit of change Can do us good So I could hide Cover myself from the din But I’ll throw open the windows despite the storm ‘Cause I’ve got faith there’ll be good things blowin’ in. (x3)
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Kelly McQuillan
Musings on creativity, productivity, and how to juggle it all with family life... Archives
December 2019
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